Today more children than
ever before are taking part in swimming.
Some do so just for fun, other children take the sport more seriously
and spend many hours every week training to perfect skills and increase fitness. Whatever the level of participation parents
play an important role. They are
naturally interested and want to help our as much as possible. Indeed, in many cases the support and
interest of one or more parents is crucial to a child’s participation.
Some mums and dads help by
taking their child to and from training or competition, others by coping with
extra washing, irregular meal times and so on.
Sometimes though a mother or father can become over involved and
inadvertently put pressure on the child to train harder that they may want to,
or to win at the expenses of enjoying taking part in galas
Watching your child compete
can be an emotionally draining experience.
You may however be taking your child’s sport more seriously that he or
she is. Most parents of course are only
trying to help, but it is important that the young athlete learns to see
training and competition not as a threat, but as a healthy, enjoyable
challenge. It is very important the
child knows that effort as well as success will be rewarded. An over-emphases on winning by one or other
parents can result in fear of failure – with your love and respect being see by
your child as contingent upon winning.
It seems that much of the
problem may be that parents are note sure how they can best help their child. This guide is aimed at the swimming parents
who want to learn to maximise that they as well as their child enjoy their
involvement in swimming.
Before reading on think for
a moment about how much your child’s sports means to you. Now gauge your involvement in your son or
daughter’s sport by reading through the questions listed below:
If you have answered “yes”
to any of these questions you many be putting unnecessary pressure on your
child, which in turn could very well lead to his or her eventual rejection of
the sport or even lasting damage to your parent/child relationship.
The Do’s and Don’t which
follow will help you maximise your contribution to your child’s sport whilst
minimising any adverse effects
Some Do’s
Do get to know your
child’s swimming coach – after all
he or she can play an important role in you child’s general development.
Do respect the coach’s
opinion – he or she should be more
knowledgeable than you – both about swimming and the development of young
swimmers
Do assess your child’s
progress – don’t be afraid to ask
the coach what plans or objectives he or she may have for your child. Ask the coach to explain to you the reasons
for any decisions you don’t understand or agree with. It is important for your child so that you can assess progress
(perhaps every few months)
Do talk to other parents – it is often a good idea to get to know other
parents so that you can share problems or car-taking duties
Do establish clear lines
of communication – in case you need
to speak to the coach regarding training or a competition find out when it is
convenient and appropriate to contact him or her, and the best way of doing
so. Don’t ever address a criticism to
or of your child or the coach in front of other parents or swimmers
Do encourage effort as
well as results – don’t assess your
child’s progress by how may galas or competitions they may win. It is important to recognise and reward
effort.
Do be generous in your
applause – it is import during
competition that you applaud all swimmers efforts. Not only does this set a
good example, but it will also reduce the pressure on all competitors.
Don’t turn a blind eye to
any bad behaviour, cheating or bad manners by you child – in such instances reasonably prompt action is
appropriate. To do otherwise will infer
that you condone such behaviour or at least do not consider personal standards
and respect of people and rules important to the sport
Don’t forget that your
child is still growing – training
which may be appropriate for an adult (e.g. prolonged repetitive activities and
work with heavy weights) can have adverse long-term effect on the growth and
development of a young child.
Don’t coach from the
poolside – try to encourage your
child to think for him or herself. A
constant stream of instruction from you many only confuse the child,
particularly if it is contrary to that of the coach
Don’t ignore aches and
pains – children are after reticent
to describe sports-related injuries, especially if it means missing training or
competition, so keep an eye on persistent grumbles about health: it is
important to take injuries seriously.
Many injuries can be prevented but if your child does get injured get
professional medical advice as soon as possible. You will find that many hospitals now run sports injury clinics,
so it advisable to find out where yours is.
If your child is taking part in intensive training, it is also advisable
to get your GP to give him or her a check up every year.
Don’t ignore other
children in the family – sometimes
brothers and sisters may feel left out or bored if the whole household revolves
around the needs of the young athlete.
It is important to try to keep a balance between swimming and the
interest of other member of your family.
Don’t allow the
situation to develop where your child is frightened of losing because of the
way you respond – a fear of failure
can often result in children feigning injury or avoiding certain galas
Don’t force a young
child to specialise entirely on swimming
– children should be allowed to develop their own preferences. In any case up to the age of 15/16 years a
concentrated diet of swimming to the exclusion of all other physical activities,
can well produce not only physical injury, but in the long term a declining
enthusiasm for the sport.
Don’t always greet your
child with “did you win?” why not
start with did you enjoy it?
Don’t attend throughout
every lesson and every competition –
it is important for your child’ future development in the sport that he or she
is trusted to make the correct decisions during either training or
competition. This is the first stage in
the development of self-motivation and self-reliance. Constant supervision, by the parent can easily result in the
young swimmers becoming emotionally, and otherwise over-dependent on your
presence and advice.
Don’t say “we won” or “we lost” – it is important that you
don’t become so involved in your child’s swimming that you find yourself saying
“we” won or “we” lost. Remember it is
your child who is participating – you are there to support and encourage, not
competing.
Providing the child is face
with realistic challenges, swimming should be fun at whatever level it is
swam. With the right parental support,
not only will your child be able to develop his or her athletic potential in an
enjoyable rather that a stressful sports environment but you will also be
providing him or her with the opportunity to obtain a senses of achievement,
competence and self-worth.
Parental
example is so important
After all if YOU cannot cope with the ups and downs of your
children’s swimming life – how can you expect THEM to?